You should absolutely set aside 10 minutes today to read Bloomberg Businessweek‘s story on John Schnatter, the disgraced Papa John’s Pizza founder who stepped down as CEO after blaming declining sales on NFL players kneeling during the National Anthem… then was fired as chairman after using a racial slur during a sensitivity-training conference call. What a life he’s lived. A terrible, greasy life. Kind of like his pizza.
Schnatter is now “seeking to clear his name,” senior writer Devin Leonard writes in the lengthy profile. “He says his exit was orchestrated by some of the company’s former officials, the NFL, and possibly even the Democratic National Committee.” There are lawsuits, full-page ads in newspapers, and the following sentences: “I’m Papa John! This is not going to blow over.” But my favorite section is during a tour of his Kentucky house:
[Schnatter] leads me through a door back into the house. We head to his gym, a cavernous room decorated with wall-to-wall memorabilia documenting his rise as a pizza mogul, and to an old-timey movie theater where he watches football. Then we climb the circular staircase up to the foyer, the centerpiece of which is a 16-foot-tall sculpture of two eagles descending from the sky, mating. “It just speaks to me,” he says, gazing up at it. “I think it’s badass.”
You read that correctly: Papa John has a sculpture of two eagles having sex in his mansion. I, too, love art. This is the most I’ve been haunted by a home tour since Dilbert dork Scott Adams showed everyone his toilet. We may never recover.
— Silvia Killingsworth (@silviakillings) November 3, 2021
“Better ingredients. Better Pizza. Two eagles descending from the sky, mating. Papa Johns.” https://t.co/sYwn0fNKy8
— Tapio (@tap_1_0) November 3, 2021
“I don’t want to be ostentatious, but let me show you this 16-foot sculpture I bought of two eagles fucking” https://t.co/4yvk0PRwE6
— Mere Smith (@EvilGalProds) November 3, 2021
There is so much incredible Papa John The Pizza Man stuff in here. As a long time “fan” I am in awe. Like I knew he’d have a lot of frescoes in his home, but he has even more than I dared dream. https://t.co/mRY0omCmDl
— David Roth (@david_j_roth) November 3, 2021
Fake humility, muscle cars, birds fucking. Math checks out https://t.co/fvJstsf0YH
— Adam (@adamg1224) November 3, 2021
I’m astounded at how divorced Papa John is. Who’s more divorced? None.
Among the divorced he stands alone. https://t.co/CDVeYkh0cV
— Flimsy Steve (@shampeon) November 3, 2021
you get $5 million but you also get horrible taste, just complete dogshit – do you take it? https://t.co/VjH8bSA9av
— Dan 90MHz (@Dan_90Mhz) November 3, 2021
The last part about 16 foot eagles humpin’ just speaking to him https://t.co/LjphhfY5Ba
— JerBear (@JD_Jerbear) November 3, 2021
Here it is:
— Mike Beauvais (@MikeBeauvais) November 3, 2021
Eat the rich > eat Papa John’s pizza.
(Via Bloomberg Businessweek)