Doctors at England’s Gloucestershire Royal Hospital found themselves on the wrong end of a potentially explosive situation last week when a man arrived to the emergency room with a World War II artillery shell lodged in his rectum. Fearing for the safety of both their patients and the hospital’s staff, a bomb squad—the Explosive Ordnance Disposal team (EOD)—was called to the scene, but doctors had already removed the munition by the time they arrived. Fortunately for all involved, the artifact in question was “not live,” according to the EOD, so “therefore not a danger to the public.”
So… just how did the item manage to creep its way into the unnamed (for obvious reasons) patient’s anus in the first place? According to The Sun, which was the first outlet to report the story, the patient—who is reportedly a collector of World War II artifacts, and apparently an enthusiastic one at that—told doctors that he “slipped and fell” on the device. Which… ummmm… errrr… ok.
“The guy said he found the shell when he was having a clear out of his stuff,” a source familiar with the situation told The Sun. “He said he put it on the floor then he slipped and fell on it—and it went up his arse… He was in a considerable amount of pain.”
A member of the 11 Explosive Ordnance Disposal Regiment, which was the squad called to the scene, said that “It was a solid shot round. It was a chunky, pointed lump of lead designed to rip through a tank’s armor. It was basically an inert lump of metal, so there was no risk to life—at least not to anyone else’s.”
The risk to the man’s pride, however, was another story.