If you were watching Tucker Carlson on Thursday evening — right around the time Russian forces were bombing a nuclear power plant in Ukraine — you were also likely either checking your calendar to see if it was April 1st or frantically staring at the chyron below his smug face to see whether hell had indeed frozen over. Because what Carlson said was utterly shocking: I was wrong!
OK, so that’s not a direct quote. What Carlson actually said was “We were wrong,” as he’s never been one to take responsibility for the dangerous lies and misinformation he spreads on a nightly basis. As of late, one of his favorite topics has been the Russia Ukraine War, which he’s treated as NBD. In fact, the Fox News host has seemed far more interested in scoring an exclusive sit-down with Vladimir Putin than he has in actually looking at the screen sitting right next to him and seeing the devastation being caused in Ukraine. It’s gotten so bad that even Newsmax (!) has called Ol’ Fish Sticks out for his pro-Putin propaganda. But on Thursday evening, Carlson finally began acting as if he has opened his eyes to the reality of what’s happening on the ground in Ukraine… and is blaming Joe Biden and Kamala Harris for his total ignorance.
That’s right: Tucker Carlson, a 52-year-old adult human who calls himself a “journalist” and works for a company with the name “News” in the title is blaming the President and Vice President of the United States for him being a dumbass who has practically been rooting Putin on. Why? Because he doesn’t think the alarm has been sounded loudly enough that Putin is not a good guy and that his violent attacks on Ukraine are a bad thing!
It’s been a week since Russia launched its first attacks on Ukraine, but it apparently took until Thursday night for Carlson to realize that this was something serious. The gravity of the situation is “shocking to us,” Carlson said. “We’ve been taken by surprise by the whole thing. We’re not the only ones who were, but we’re willing to admit it. The only thing more embarrassing than being wrong in your estimates is pretending that you weren’t. So why didn’t we see this coming—this total loss of control?”
Tucker says he was wrong about Ukraine and blames Biden and Harris for him being wrong pic.twitter.com/Eal5p8hdMu
— Acyn (@Acyn) March 4, 2022
Note: We did, Tucker. Everyone did. But not Tucker, and here’s why:
“We assumed if things were dire, serious people would be involved in fixing them. But we looked up and we saw Kamala Harris involved, and that reassured us… If the future of Europe and the world hung in the balance, as now so obviously it does, of course the Biden administration would not have sent Kamala Harris to fix it. ‘Cause that’s not her job. Kamala Harris’ job is to trot down to the Blue Room periodically to greet delegations of TikTok influencers. Or cut occasional PSAs for the Children’s Dental Health Awareness Month, which is in February, so we assumed she’d be working on that right now.”
First off: It’s March now, Tucker. Second: What a dick!!
Carlson still wasn’t finished though, because he had to delve into his weird obsession with Harris’ dating history with Montel Williams.
“So if you’re looking for someone to date Montel Williams, well maybe she’s the person you would choose,” he said. “She could be a solid choice, she’s done it before. Dating Montel Williams – you know – is something that’s within her range of experience. Is she good at it? We can’t say. But she’s done it.”
After spending more time denigrating a Black woman—for the second time in 24 hours, no less—Carlson again admitted that “we were wrong,” then proceeded to blame his inability to, I don’t know, click on a real news site or listen to one of his colleagues, like Jennifer Griffin or Sean Hannity (yes, it feels weird to type his name in defense of something), on the president.
But ultimately, the only thing Carlson says he’s guilty of is looking to Biden—the president he shreds to bits every chance he gets—for leadership.
“We didn’t underestimate Vladimir Putin,” Carlson said. “We overestimated Joe Biden.”