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Trevor Noah Is Convinced That Ron DeSantis ‘Is The Earth’s Biggest Dick’

Trevor Noah was full of fire on Thursday, as he kicked off The Daily Show with what he described as “one of the most amazing and positive stories involving a billionaire.” He went on to share how Yvon Chouinard, founder of the outdoor brand Patagonia, has donated his $3 billion company to fighting climate change. Then, unfortunately, he was forced to shift gears. “Because while the owner of Patagonia is trying to be the Earth’s biggest advocate, Florida governor Ron DeSantis is trying to be the Earth’s biggest dick.”

While DeSantis was probably already halfway toward that title, thanks to his fights with Disney and millions of everyday Americans over his “Don’t Say Gay” bill, his decision to use human beings seeking a better life in America as political pawns may have just sealed the deal.

Taking a cue from Texas governor and fellow ghoul Greg Abbott, who really seems to have amused himself by putting migrants on buses to Washington, DC, DeSantis really took basic humanity to new lows when he “borrowed” a group of Venezuelan migrants who came into Texas and sent two planes of them to the tiny island of Martha’s Vineyard — a move that prompted documentarian Ken Burns to compare him to Hitler.

What DeSantis might not have expected was that the tiny island community of less than 20,000 year-round residents rallied to welcome the unexpected visitors, and provide them with the food and shelter they needed. While the planes took off from San Antonio, DeSantis’ office proudly took credit for paying for them. Noah was almost at a loss for words in responding to the stunt:

You know, there’s a**holes, and then there’s this guy. No, because you know sometimes someone is so terrible the word ‘a**hole’ doesn’t quite capture their essence enough, you know? ‘Cause everyone is an asshole. Like, my neighbor’s an asshole. Drivers in traffic are assholes. Hell, I’m an asshole. But Ron DeSantis, he’s like the little edges, the little ridges around the asshole, that really catch all the sh*t.

Because he couldn’t show a picture of what that part of one’s rectum looks like, Noah instead shared a photo of a star-nosed mole, “so you know exactly what I’m trying to say.”

Trevor Noah Star-Nosed Mole
Comedy Central

Noah’s main point, however, was that DeSantis is the governor of Florida. “So why is he grabbing refugees in Texas and shipping them to Massachusetts? Why, so he can prove that America’s immigration system is broken? Yeah, everyone knows that. But instead of pushing lawmakers to actually reform the system, he’s using taxpayer money to, what, go viral?”

What really pisses Noah off is that “if you told DeSantis to spend the same amount of money helping these asylum-seekers, he’d be like, ‘Oh, we don’t have the funding for that.’ But to troll the Democrats, suddenly he’s like, ‘Put it on my card!’

You can watch the full clip above, beginning around the 2:10 mark.