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The Astros Fan Who Threw A Beer At Ted Cruz Insists He Just Wanted Him To Chug It

The Houston Astros held their championship parade on Monday after taking down the Philadelphia Phillies in 6 games in the World Series to win their second title in the last six years.

Among the participants in the parade was Ted Cruz, noted Houston native, despicable human being, and U.S. Senator, who got booed resoundingly by Astros fans (weeks after getting booed and heckled by Yankees fans in New York while watching the Astros in the ALCS). Not only was he booed, but at one point a fan chucked a beer at him, which led to charges being brought against the man for assault with a deadly weapon (which is a not normally something I’d classify a beer can as).

On Wednesday, the attorneys for the fan who threw the beer, whose name is Joey Arcidiacono, released a statement (confirmed to be the real thing by the Houston Chronicle) insisting that this was not an act of political violence but instead just a man giving out beers for folks in the parade to chug.

The statement even cites a text sent prior to the parade in which he details his plans to hopefully get a player to chug one of his beers, as that has become a regular element of championship parades in recent years, with players Stone Colding beers tossed to their buses by fans. Unfortunately for Arcidiacono, if you take him at his word, his act of kindness and goodwill was taken as an attack on a sitting U.S. Senator and he now faces some legal trouble for simply being a nice guy who wants everyone to partake in the fun.

I will say if the goal was to get Cruz to chug the beer, it certainly came in a little hot for that, which hurts his case here. You’d normally see a beer can lobbed in rather than giving him a heater, but maybe in all the excitement he was just trying to put a beer on target and Ted just couldn’t see the generous nature because, well, he’s never been generous in his life.