Warning: Spoilers for Gen V episode four below.
The Boys manages to stir up a bit of trouble on the latest episode of Gen V as a familiar name arrives to wreak havoc at Godolkin University. Tek-Knight (Derek Wilson) is busy profiting from his questionable interrogation methods by making them the star of his hit true crime series, and the next mystery he’s determined to solve is the implosions of God U’s most promising student.
While Dean Shetty (Shelley Conn) tries to manage the horny bloodhound, the students launch a rescue mission for Emma that ends with what might be the most confusing cliffhanger we’ve seen from Eric Kripke and his team of evil, dick-obsessed geniuses.
Here is where our f*cked up leaderboard sits after episode episode four’s “The Whole Truth.”
6. The Cardosa Scientific Method
The Boys universe has always been keen to educate us on human anatomy via grotesque close-ups so, of course, the episode would launch with a detailed look at the ear canal Cricket went swimming in last week. Dr. Cardosa – the university’s brilliant scientist in charge of developing a method for controlling too-powerful supes like Sam – is at a loss as to how the kid managed to explode the guard’s brain from the inside. His working theory? Sam skull-f*cked the man’s ear to death. If these are the kind of geniuses Dean Shetty surrounds herself with, maybe she does deserve to be fired.
5. Tag Team Cocksplosions
Rufus – the Neo-Nazi-looking-frat-bro who perfected his batting swing via Cate’s help – turns out to be the resident Miss Cleo on campus. The only problem? He’s happy to use his mind-altering abilities to supernaturally roofie female students. Marie becomes his next target after she asks for his help in finding Emma but Jordan manages to distract him long enough for her to work her blood magic. Who hasn’t wanted to explode a creep’s penis at least once in their life?
4. Emma Grows Up
So far, all we’ve seen of Emma’s abilities is how purging herself allows her to shrink in size which, in turn, can sometimes end with a man’s eardrum hanging off her shoulder. But, when Sam loses it at Dr. Cardosa’s house and the rest of the supe squad can’t control him, Emma pulls off another Alice in Wonderland-esque trick – except, instead of cake, she gorges on homemade spaghetti to grow to the size of a middle-class suburban home.
3. Jason Ritter’s Murderous Muppets
The only thing more terrifying than an ungovernable all-powerful supe who hears voices inside his head is the idea that those voices belong to television’s Jason Ritter and a Muppet version of The Deep. Poor Sam doesn’t want to kill Cardosa but when you’ve got demonic Sesame Street characters peer pressuring you to do murder … you kind of just have to do murder, ya know?
2. Tek Knight’s Greatest Hits Holes
Tek-Knight has been alluded to in almost every season of The Boys and Gen V did him justice, painting him as the perfect blend of dangerous and idiotic as he scours the school for a student patsy he can pin Golden Boy’s meltdown on. When he finally settles on Dean Shetty, she uses her own human powers of manipulation to uncover his terminal illness and the pathetic kink that’s somehow a symptom of it. We’re not ones to shame someone’s sexual appetites, but if you can’t keep it in your pants around a bagel breakfast bar, a vacuum hose, the gas tank of a Toyota 4 Runner, a tree, a safety cone, a decorative skull, or the hot air hand dryer in a public restroom, you need help.
1. Hangover From Hell
There are cliffhangers and then there’s whatever the hell happened at the end of this week’s episode. One minute an oversized, in-the-nude Cricket is holding Sam down by Cardosa’s backyard pool as the rest of the group tries to assure him everything’s fine, the next, Jordan and Marie are waking up naked in bed with no memory of what happened or how they got there. Someone make it make sense.