Category: Worldwide

In case there wasn’t enough proof that Friends was a certified hit, Hollywood superstar Julia Roberts appeared in a Season 2 post-Super Bowl episode. It was a major casting coup that all went down thanks to some heavy flirting and an eventual romance with Matthew Perry.

While promoting her new movie Leave the World Behind, Roberts recently opened up about Perry’s passing and her one-time cameo on the beloved sitcom. “All good thoughts and feelings,” Roberts told Entertainment Tonight of the Super Bowl episode where she played an old classmate of Chandler who was out for hilarious revenge:

“They were all so welcoming to me as just a kind of a one-off character and it was a really fun time,” she continued.

“The sudden passing of anybody so young is heartbreaking,” Roberts said of her ex. “I think that, you know, it just helps all of us just appreciate what we have and to keep going in a positive way as best we can.”

In his memoir, Perry wrote about the three-month courtship with Roberts that all started with when the A-lister said she’d do the show, but only if she was in a Chandler storyline. “Was I having a good year or what?” Perry wrote.

However, the actor first had to “woo” Roberts and explain quantum physics to her. (Yes, really.) With some help from the Friends writers, Perry managed to get the girl and lock down a major cameo for the show that was only in its second season.

(Via Entertainment Tonight)

Anyone who’s ever been on Tinder knows having a cute animal in the photo is usually a big hit.

But what if Tinder profile photos only featured that cute animal? And what if, instead of a millennial would-be hooker-upper, it was the adorable dog or cat itself looking for true love?

That’s an idea some animal shelters are toying with.

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“We are always trying to come up with … creative new ways to get our shelter dogs out in front of potential adopters,” says Karen Hirsch, public relations director at LifeLine Animal Project in Georgia.

And experimenting with online dating for dogs and cats might just be working.

The harsh world of pet adoption is extremely competitive: About 6.5 million dogs and cats enter U.S. shelters every year, each seeking a good forever home. It’s too big a need for shelter operators to just sit back and hope they all get adopted.

That’s why you see adorable dogs on display outside the grocery store, partnerships with Uber that will bring puppies directly to you for playtime, and aww-inspiring social media campaigns like dogs in pajamas.

An estimated 50 million people worldwide use Tinder. So LifeLine and other shelters and rescues figure why not give it a shot?

After all, people using online dating apps are already looking for love and companionship — just maybe a slightly different kind.

Hirsch says they recently created profiles for 22 of their dogs and cats.

Animal profiles are also showing up on Bumble, which is home to another 20 million users or so.

Like sweet Duke here.

Each pet is assigned to a volunteer who creates the profile and handles the conversations after a match

“In a crowded shelter, pets often get overlooked, but on a dating app, the animal becomes an individual,” Hirsch says. “People learn about them and form a ‘virtual’ attachment.”

Plus the witty banter is oodles of fun.

For LifeLine, the experiment is still new. But Hirsch says people are responding to it incredibly well so far.

At the very least, Tinder and Bumble have proven to be great for word-of-mouth awareness-building on the importance of adopting shelter pets. The animals are getting dozens of matches. Hirsch says there have been more than a few online adoption inquiries, as well as people coming into the shelter to meet their “match” in person.

She also notes that one of the matches even became a regular volunteer at LifeLine.

This new animal dating idea has another upside for apps — and the people using them, too.

Dating experts are finding that people are getting burned out by online dating. Between “ghosting,” “cushioning,” “the slow fade,” and a bunch more of those annoying slang terms, humans out there are wondering if dating apps are even worth the effort.

For romantic love, who knows?

But now that you might just meet the dog or cat of your dreams, that’s not a bad reason to keep on swiping.

This article originally appeared on 01.10.18

Grieving in the technology age is uncharted territory.

I’ll take you back to Saturday, June 9, 2012. At 8:20 a.m., my 36-year-old husband was pronounced dead at a hospital just outside Washington, D.C.

By 9:20 a.m., my cellphone would not stop ringing or text-alerting me long enough for me to make the necessary calls that I needed to make: people like immediate family, primary-care doctors to discuss death certificates and autopsies, funeral homes to discuss picking him up, and so on. Real things, important things, time-sensitive, urgent things.

At 9:47 a.m., while speaking to a police officer (because yes, when your spouse dies, you must be questioned by the police immediately), one call did make it through. I didn’t recognize the number. But in those moments, I knew I should break my normal rule and answer all calls. “He’s dead??? Oh my God. Who’s with you? Are you OK? Why am I reading this on Facebook? Taya, what the heck is going on?”

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Facebook? I was confused. I hadn’t been on Facebook since the day before, so I certainly hadn’t taken the time in the last 90 minutes to peek at the site.

“I’ll call you back”, I screamed and hung up. I called my best friend and asked her to search for anything someone might have written and to contact them immediately and demand they delete it. I still hadn’t spoken to his best friend, or his godsister, or our godchild’s parents, or a million other people! Why would someone post it to Facebook SO FAST?

While I can in no way speak for the entire planet, I certainly feel qualified to propose some suggestions — or, dare I say, rules — for social media grieving.

How many RIPs have you seen floating through your social media stream over the last month? Probably a few. Death is a fate that we will each meet at some point. The Information Age has changed the ways in which we live and communicate daily, yet there are still large voids in universally accepted norms.

This next statement is something that is impossible to understand unless you’ve been through it:

There is a hierarchy of grief.

Yes, a hierarchy. It’s something people either don’t understand or understand but don’t want to think or talk about — yet we must.

There is a hierarchy of grief.

Hierarchy is defined as:

1. a system or organization in which people or groups are ranked one above the other according to status or authority, and
2. an arrangement or classification of things according to relative importance or inclusiveness.

What does this mean as it relates to grief? Let me explain. When someone dies — whether suddenly or after a prolonged illness, via natural causes or an unnatural fate, a young person in their prime or an elderly person with more memories behind them than ahead — there is one universal truth : The ripples of people who are affected is vast and, at times, largely unknown to all other parties.

A death is always a gut punch with varying degrees of force and a reminder of our own mortality. Most people are moved to express their love for the deceased by showing their support to the family and friends left behind.

In the days before social media, these expressions came in the form of phone calls, voicemail messages, and floral deliveries.

If you were lucky enough to be in close proximity to the family of the newly deceased, there were visits that came wrapped with hugs and tears, and deliveries of food and beverages to feed all the weary souls.

Insert social media. All of those courtesies still occur, but there is a new layer of grief expression — the online tribute in the form of Facebook posts, Instagram photo collages, and short tweets.

What’s the problem with that? Shouldn’t people be allowed to express their love, care, concern, support, and prayers for the soul of the recently deceased and for their family?

Yes.

And no.

Why? Because there are no established “rules,” and people have adopted their own. This isn’t breaking news, and you’re not trying to scoop TMZ. Listen, I know you’re hurt. Guess what? Me too. I know you’re shocked. Guess what? Me too. Your social media is an extension of who you are. I get it. You “need” to express your pain, acknowledge your relationship with the deceased, and pray for the family.

Yes.

However…

Please give us a minute.

We are shocked.

We are heartbroken.

Give the immediate family or circle a little time to handle the immediate and time-sensitive “business” related to death. In the minutes and early hours after someone passes away, social media is most likely the last thing on their minds. And even if it does cross their mind, my earlier statement comes into play here.

There is a hierarchy of grief.

Please pause and consider your role and relationship to the newly deceased. Remember, hierarchy refers to your status and your relative importance to the deceased. I caution you to wait and then wait a little longer before posting anything. This may seem trivial, silly, and not worth talking about, but I promise you it isn’t.

If the person is married, let the spouse post first.

If the person is “young” and single, let the partner, parents, or siblings post first.

If the person is “old” and single, let the children post first.

If you can’t identify the family/inner circle of the person, you probably shouldn’t be posting at all.

Do you get where I’m going with this?

In theory, we should never compare grief levels, cast the grief-stricken survivors into roles, or use words like status and importance. But maybe we need to at this moment (and for the next few weeks and months).

The “RIP” posts started hitting my timeline about an hour after my husband’s death, and I certainly didn’t start them. This created a sense of confusion, fear, anxiety, panic, dread, and shock for the people who knew me, too. What’s wrong? Who are we praying for? Did something happen? Did someone pass? Why are there RIPs on your wall and I can’t reach you? Call me please! What’s going on?

That’s a small sample of messages on my voicemail and text inbox. I had to take a minute in the midst of it all to ask a friend to post a status to my Facebook page on my behalf.

Your love and expressions of support are appreciated and needed, but they can also be ill-timed and create unintended additional stress.

The person is no less dead and your sympathy no less heartfelt if your post, photo, or tweet is delayed by a few hours. Honestly, the first couple of hours are shocking, and many things are a blur. Most bereaved people will be able to truly appreciate your love, concern, prayers, and gestures after the first 24 hours.

I’ve learned this from the inside — twice within the last four years. And I assure you that if we each adopted a little patience and restraint in this area, we would help those who are in the darkest hours of their lives by not adding an unnecessary layer of stress.

A few extra hours could make all the difference.

This article originally appeared on 05.07.19

Before 54-year-old Mario passed away, he had one special goodbye he needed to say … to his favorite giraffe.

Mario had worked as a maintenance man at the Rotterdam zoo in the Netherlands for over 25 years. After his shifts, he loved to visit and help care for the animals, including the giraffes.

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As Mario’s fight against terminal brain cancer came to an end, all he wanted to do was visit the zoo one last time. He wanted to say goodbye to his colleagues — and maybe share a final moment with some of his furry friends.

Thanks to one incredible organization, Mario got his wish.

“To say goodbye to the animals.”

The Ambulance Wish Foundation, a Dutch nonprofit, helps people like Mario experience one final request.

It’s a lot like Make-A-Wish, only it’s not just for kids.

In 2006, Kees Veldboer, who was an ambulance driver at the time, was moving a patient from one hospital to another. The patient was a terminally ill man who had spent three straight months confined to a hospital bed. During the trip from one hospital to the other, the patient told Veldboer that he wanted to see the Vlaardingen canal one last time. He wanted to sit in the sun and wind and smell the water again before going back inside.

“To see the ocean again.”

Veldboer made the patient’s last wish happen, and as tears of joy streamed down the man’s face, Veldboer knew he had tapped into a powerful way to bring peace to people in their final days.

Soon after, the Ambulance Wish Foundation was born.

Based in the Netherlands, Veldboer’s organization scoffs at the logistical hurdles of transporting terminally ill patients who need high levels of care and, often, lots of medical equipment. The Ambulance Wish Foundation employs a fleet of custom-built ambulances and always has highly trained medical staff on hand for emergencies.

“To visit my best friend’s grave.”

Their message? Positive end-of-life experiences are far too important to pass up.

Today, the AWF has over 230 volunteers and has fulfilled nearly 7,000 wishes.

Even more beautiful than the work this organization does, though, are the things its patients are asking for.

“To enjoy a delicious ice cream cone.”

The Make-A-Wish Foundation specializes in granting wishes for children with life-threatening illnesses, many of whom have barely begun to live. The children’s wishes run the gamut, from starring in a music video to a day as a hero soldier in the Army.

But what does Veldboer do for older folks who have already experienced so much? What do their wishes look like?

Mostly, it’s the little things they cherish, like seeing their home one last time or spending a few hours just looking at something beautiful.

Veldboer, in an interview with the BBC, describes one woman who had not been home for six months. When they brought her into her living room on a stretcher, she hoisted herself up and stayed there for hours, doing nothing but looking around — likely replaying an entire lifetime worth of memories — before quietly asking them to take her away.

Another patient simply wanted to see her favorite Rembrandt painting again.

“To see my favorite painting one last time.”

And another just wanted to spend an afternoon watching dolphins play.

“To watch the dolphins play.”

On and on the wishes go — about four of them fulfilled every day. People who just want to see their grandchild for the first time, or stand on the beach again before they can’t anymore.

Turns out that life’s simplest pleasures just might be its most meaningful.

Sometimes it feels like there’s never enough time. Not in a day. Not in a year. Not in a life.

“To attend my granddaughter’s wedding.”

But maybe it’s better to cherish what we have rather than spend so much time thinking about all the things we haven’t done yet.

Maybe the things we remember at the end aren’t the time we went skydiving or the time we hiked across Europe. When our time is up, maybe what we’ll remember most is more mundane — the tacky wallpaper in the house we grew up in, a sunny day spent on the water, or those little everyday moments spent with the people we love the most.

Whatever it is, it’s comforting to know there are people out there who want our last memories of this place to be good ones.

I can’t think of a more wonderful job.

This article originally appeared on 09.30.15

In June 2015 The Supreme Court of the United States declared same-sex marriage legal in all 50 states.

The legalization of gay marriage granted over 1100 statutory provisions to same-sex couples, many of them granting rights and privileges previously only afforded to heterosexual couples.

After the decision, President Barack Obama said the ruling will “strengthen all of our communities” by offering dignity and equal status to all same-sex couples and their families.

He called it a “victory for America.”

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However, the law didn’t just benefit same-sex couples who want to get married, it also had a dramatic affect on LGBT youth. Two years after the legalization of gay marriage, the suicide attempt rate among LGBT youth declined significantly according to the Associated Press.

Suicide is the second-leading cause of death for U.S. teens. LGBT teens are five times more likely to make an attempt than their straight peers.

The study was conducted with over 26,000 LGBT youth participants in the 32 states where gay marriage was legalized up through the 2015 Supreme Court decision. The study found that suicide attempt rates dropped 7% among all students and 14% among gay kids after same-sex marriage was legalized in each state.

Part of the drop in suicide attempts by kids who didn’t publicly identify that they were gay could be because they were closeted or questioning.

There was no change in states where same-sex marriage wasn’t legalized.

While the change in suicide attempts doesn’t prove there’s a direct connection, researchers believe that the law made LGBT kids feel “more hopeful for the future.” They also believe the measures increased tolerance among their straight peers while reducing the stigmatization felt by gay kids.

A study out of Denmark and Sweden published in 2019 found similar results among married gay couples.

Same-sex marriage was made legal in 2009 in Sweden and 2012 in Denmark.

The study found that couples in same-sex unions saw a 46% decline in suicide suicide, compared to 28% of those in heterosexual unions.

“Although suicide rates in the general populations of Denmark and Sweden have been decreasing in recent decades, the rate for those living in same-sex marriage declined at a steeper pace, which has not been noted previously,” researchers noted.

These studies show the power that societal recognition can have on stigmatized minority groups. When one is protected by the “law of the land” it means a lot more than what happens in a courtroom or at city hall.

It shows that you are accepted by the community and protected by those in power. For to love flourish — whether it’s loving oneself or sharing it with a partner — first it must first be protected.

This article originally appeared on 01.24.20

Last November, Upworthy published a popular story about Chloe Sexton, a mother who went viral on TikTok for a video she made explaining “daddy privilege” or the idea that fathers are applauded for doing things that mothers are supposed to do.

“In my opinion, ‘daddy privilege’ is that subtle upper hand men sidestep into as parents that allows them to gain praise for simply…being a parent,” she said. “You fed the baby? What a great dad! You held the baby while mommy bathed? So considerate of you! You picked up something for dinner? What would your family do without you?! It’s all the little ways mothers do exactly what the world expects of them without a second thought and then watch fathers get praised for simply showing up.”

Sadly, the post resonated with a lot of mothers, because it’s true. Expectations for fathers are so low that men are commended for handling basic parenting tasks. But if a mother falls short of perfection, she faces harsh criticism.

Mary Catherine Starr, a mother living in Cape Cod who owns a design studio and teaches yoga, is getting a lot of love on Instagram for her cartoon series that perfectly explains daddy privilege.

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In “An Illustrated Guide to the Double Standards of Parenting,” Starr shares this concept by showing that when a man comes home with fast food for his kids he’s the “fun dad.” But if a mom comes back with a bag from McDonald’s she is seen as a “lazy mom.”

In the comics, the same double standards apply whether it’s how they handle technology or parent at the park.

(Note: Click the arrow on the right-hand side of the image to see the slideshow.)

See on Instagram

Starr was quick to point out in the comments that the target of her comics isn’t fathers, but society at large. “This is not a dig at dads, it’s a dig at our society—a society that applauds dads for handling the most basic of parenting duties + expects nothing short of perfection from mothers (or even worse, shames them for every decision and/or move they make!),” she wrote.

The comics resonated with a lot of women.

“This hit a nerve with so many women! I was a single mom living in an apartment,” an Instagram user named Saturdayfarm wrote in the comments. “Next door – a single dad. Neighbors felt so bad for him that they helped him with his laundry, brought over food, and babysat. For nothing. I just shakily carried on somehow. And I had so much less money and opportunities.”

“This is exactly part of the why I feel like being ‘just’ a mom isn’t as valuable. Being so run of the mill. But if my husband has the baby in a sling, the toddler in the pram and is out walking the dog, he’s superman for letting me have one hour for zoom work,” rebecca_lee-close_yoga wrote.

A father who understands his privilege completely supports Starr’s message.

“It actually annoys me when I get those types of comments / ‘compliments’ knowing it’s totally a double standard,” JonaJooey wrote.

Starr’s comics and Sexton’s TikTok videos won’t stop the double standards when it comes to parenting, but they do a great job at holding a mirror up to the problem. Where do we go from here? We can start by having greater expectations for fathers and holding them up to a higher standard. Then, we should take the energy we put into praising dads for doing the bare minimum and heap it on mothers who thanklessly go about the most important job in the world.

This story originally appeared on 02.01.22

Not everyone enjoys flying. The level of non-enjoyment can range from mild discomfort to full blown Aerophobia, which is defined as an extreme fear of flying. While flying is the quickest way to get to far away destinations, for some people being that far off the ground is terrifying and they’d rather take their chances on the ground.

A passenger flying from Charlotte-Douglas International Airport in North Carolina to JFK International Airport in New York confronted that fear while flying with Delta. The woman, who is currently still unidentified expressed that she was nervous to fly according to Molly Simonson Lee, a passenger seated behind the woman who witnessed the encounter. Tight spaces don’t make for much privacy, but in this case, the world is better for knowing this took place.

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According to Lee, who posted about the exchange on Facebook, the Delta flight attendant, Floyd Dean-Shannon, took his time to give the nervous traveler his undivided attention. Lee told Upworthy the unidentified passenger, “was very nervous and even before the plane took off, she was visibly shaken by each sound.”

Approximately 25 million people in the United States have Aerophobia according to the Clevland Clinic and most of them probably wish Dean-Shannon was on their flights. “He took notice and began explaining what each [sound] was, with the warmest, calmest tone,” Lee said. That wasn’t even the most amazingly sweet part of the story.

While the explanation of noises helped, Lee said about halfway through the flight the passenger was fighting back tears, which prompted Dean-Shannon to sit on the floor and hold the frightened passenger’s hand. He comforted her for the rest of the flight while sitting on the floor. “His tone was so kind and soothing,” according to Lee.

Dean-Shannon’s kindness didn’t stop there. Lee explained, “the woman next to me was celebrating a birthday and he sang to her and made her a ‘cake’ with all of the goodies he could round up.”

I’m not sure what Delta pays him but he needs a raise immediately and it seems the people of the interwebs agree.

Commenter, Miranda Anderson, tagged Delta Airlines and wrote, “I hope you see this! These are the types of people that deserve raises and make your company worth flying with. This is what pits [sic] you above the others so show these employees this is what you want and what you need.”

“I love this. This is what society is lacking. Empathy and kindness towards people in time[s] of need” wrote Diane Lawrence.

While Mary Beth Acker Ford, said, “I was on a flight with him today. He exudes joy and is intentional about making a connection with each person!”

This level of engagement with passengers is not a common experience but clearly people are happy to see this type of connection between humans. Flying anywhere can be stressful for any amount of reasons. From leaving the house late and having to participate in an involuntary 5k to catch your flight, to making your way through the devil’s backyard, also known as Atlanta International Airport…just for them to change your gate 10 minutes before boarding.

So having a flight attendant like Dean-Shannon is just the breath of fresh air people need. “The way he’s looking at her…letting her know she’s safe!!! This is just one of the many reasons I will always fly Delta Air Lines,” Liz Martin wrote in the comments.

“It was obvious he is just a good, kind soul who shares that generously with everyone he encounters. Such kindness is rare and a true gift when encountered,” Lee remarked. That level of kindness is rare indeed and we sure are happy someone thought to capture it.

This article originally appeared on 01.19.23

Meghan Smith is the owner of Melody Note Vintage store in the eternally hip town of Palm Springs, California, and her old-school Gen X advice has really connected with younger people on TikTok.

In a video posted in December 2022, she shares the advice she wishes that “somebody told me in my twenties” and it has received more than 13 million views. Smith says that she gave the same advice to her partner’s two daughters when they reached their twenties.

The video is hashtagged #GenX advice for #GenZ and late #millennials. Sorry older millennials, you’re too old to receive these pearls of wisdom.

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Here is some of the timeless advice that Smith shares in the video.

Perfection is bullshit.

You will never be more good-looking than you are today.

Put your phone down and enjoy your life.

Don’t change for anybody.

Don’t worry about making mistakes.

Laugh at yourself.

If somebody shows you their true colors, believe them.

Travel.

You end up dating the people you think you deserve. Usually, you deserve better.

Don’t forget to always wear your sunscreen.

@melodynotevintage

This might only help one person and thats ok. Advice I wish somebody told me in my twenties. #genx advice for #genz and late #millennials #adviceforyour20s #lifeadvice #fyp dont be an asshat in the comments if you are older, its not helpful.

She followed up the video with a sequel with even more sage advice.

Know who’s on your side and who you can ask for help.

Don’t smoke.

Don’t spend longer than one year with the wrong person.

Find your own style.

Don’t stress over the small stuff.

Good manners don’t go out of style.

Do the work that it takes to be really good at something.

Your happiness is more important than other people’s disappointment.

@melodynotevintage

This might only help one person and thats ok. Advice I wish somebody told me in my twenties part 2 #genx advice for #genz and late #millennials #adviceforyour20s #lifeadvice #fyp

This article originally appeared on 1.18.23

Travis Scott’s got some new sneakers on the way. He has once again teamed up with Jordan Brand/Nike to release another pair of olive-infused Air Jordan 1s, this time with a black base. Photos of the samples surfaced online, sparking excitement from hypebeasts who can’t get enough of Scott’s Nike collabs (another of which is coming later this month in the form of the Mac Attack worn by the tennis legend John McEnroe). So, how can you get some Travis Scott x Air Jordan 1 low “Black Olives?”

Unfortunately, details about the release are limited at this time. While the Instagram accounts and blogs posting about the sneakers note that they are ostensibly due sometime in Fall of 2024, previous releases were dropped at select retailers and on Nike’s SNKRS app (which caused no shortage of hurt feelings over the Ls that were taken for those prior releases). Of course, there’s also the the old standby, StockX, and similar resale sites, where you can try your luck (and pay a markup). We’ll likely find out more closer to the release date, which will probably be sometime in 2024, as the next upcoming release is for the Mac Attacks. Stay tuned for more info.

In the 1971 film Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory, Gene Wilder plays Willy Wonka as both whimsical and meticulous, but also with a side of sadistic evil. If one were to start listing the literal crimes Wonka commits during that movie, it sure doesn’t sound like a beloved children’s film that has stood the test of time and still generates memes and gifs as never-ending as gobstopper. Okay, so, sure, that version of Wonka should probably be in jail (who knows, maybe his upcoming prison sentence is why he needed to unload the factory in the first place) but he was also a character who just seemed to be all-knowing at all times and was indeed fascinating.

So now here we are with Paul King’s Wonka, a look at what made this guy tick in the first place, now played by Timothée Chalamet. So … there are a lot of, let’s say, interesting plot decisions in this musical, Wonka. (Oh, make no mistake, this is very much a musical even though for some reasons the marketing is avoiding that.) Plot decisions that I can’t stop thinking about. Like, “why?” The filmmakers seem to very much want to tie this movie to the 1971 film (I don’t think we talk about the Johnny Depp movie anymore) and Gene Wilder left a beautiful gift of a performance. His undercurrent of kind of being a sociopath actually did leave a lot of ground to explore. But why was he so ruthless? How did he become this way? How did he build this factory in the first place?

So, let me guess. You probably think Wonka is about how Willy Wonka built his famed chocolate factory. If that’s what you think, you are wrong. The plot of the movie is about how Willy Wonka is illiterate. I do confess, I’m endlessly fascinated that this is what was come up with. It’s like they were specifically told, “We know you want to make this about building the factory, but it can’t be about building the factory.”

We see young Wonka come to the big city – Chalamet plays Wonka with a lot of charm – though he also has to play a character who literally can’t spell the word “cat*” – and finds himself in need of a place to stay. Willy has no money, but he’s presented with a contract too good to be true that lets him stay now and he can pay later. Of course, since Willy is illiterate he can’t read the contract that says he now owes 10,000 units of currency for the room and if he can’t pay it off he has to work for the inn for one unit of currency a day for 10,000 days – which comes to roughly 27 years. Willy now has to sell chocolate on the street to try and earn enough money to pay off his hotel bill. So anyway, that’s the plot of Wonka.

(*Oh, I am well aware eagle-eyed readers will now be looking for every work I misspell.)

Willy does have some company in his forced labor situation, as there were some other people who also fell for the trick of signing the contract, even though it does appear the rest of them can read. Most notably, Willy befriends Noodle (Calah Lane), who is a young orphaned girl who teaches Willy how to make his way at the inn without getting in trouble. (Apparently, the contract is so airtight that even if Willy escaped the police would just bring him back to the inn.) Wonka spends a lot of time exploring Noodle’s backstory and the grand mystery of who her parents might be.

Willy loves chocolate. To the point, I don’t remember any other iteration of this character loving chocolate as much as Willy loves chocolate. It’s explained that Willy can’t read because he devoted all of his studies to chocolate. And he seemingly can make chocolate from anything, including thunderstorms, bugs, and clown tears. Which seems to suggest Willy is supernatural, even though he’s illiterate and can’t figure his way out of a contract with a local inn. There are times when Willy is making some new chocolate treat, using his portable chocolate maker, and Chalamet starts channeling Jim Carrey’s Lloyd Christmas – to be fair, Lloyd Christmas can’t read the word “the,” so maybe there was some inspiration here – then Willy becomes less frantic and more whimsical as he sings a song.

There’s also a chocolate cartel run by three chocolate barons who don’t like it that Willy is selling chocolate on their turf, so they bribe (with chocolate, of course) the local chief of police (Keegan-Michael Key) to intimidate Willy into giving up chocolate. A running joke of the movie is that the chief takes so many bribes over the course of the movie that he becomes obese – which frankly isn’t really funny but the filmmakers seem to think it is. Hugh Grant plays an Oompa-Loompa and, as you might expect, gets most of the funny lines in the movie. (Though, I couldn’t help thinking, if I’m an actor who fits the physical description for this particular character and wanted that role, yeah I’d probably be pretty annoyed it went to Hugh Grant.)

Look, I’ll admit, the sequel to Wonka looks pretty good! The plot of this movie leaves off exactly where you probably assumed this movie would start, but for some reason didn’t. And like I said earlier, Timothée Chalamet plays Willy Wonka with a lot of charm and I bet it’s not easy to play someone who is all-knowing, possibly supernatural, but is also not very smart at times.

A friend of mine was texting me about this movie and had assumed, like most people, it was about Willy building the factory. I responded with the actual plot description and he did not believe me. And to be fair, in short texts, it does sounds fake, “The plot is Willy can’t read.” So I leave this movie, and this piece about this movie, truly baffled. But also still quite fascinated.

You can contact Mike Ryan directly on Twitter.