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Mac DeMarco Shares A Surreal And Bizarre Trailer For His New Website ‘Eternal Family’

As the coronavirus pandemic forces festivals, concert tours, and album releases to be postponed or canceled entirely, musicians across the globe are coping with the financial effect of the virus in their own way. Some big-label artists are fortunate enough to be able to donate funds to benefit those in need. Other artists who are more independent, however, are coming up with creative ways to substitute revenue. Mac DeMarco and a group of collaborators shared their new subscription-based web platform Eternal Family as a way to stay creative and support themselves through the pandemic.

DeMarco shared a surreal and esoteric trailer to the site. Animated to be an otter-like character grinning at a computer screen, DeMarco explained the new platform: “Hi. I want to tell you about a new entertainment service. It’s called Eternal Family and you can gain access through,” DeMarco says in the trailer’s opening. “It’s an artist-run membership experience and a place to try out new ideas.”

Essentially, the new site is similar to that of a Patreon. Those who choose to subscribe for $5 a month of $50 a year get exclusive access to entertaining videos and other content from DeMarco and his musical friends. Fellow musician Jerry Paper will be creating his own videos to add to the website and DeMarco will share segments about his favorite audio recording techniques.

Sharing the trailer to Instagram, DeMarco’s longtime collaborative partner Cole Kush further explained the site, saying its a way to financially help out musicians and creatives: “60% of the monthly revenue goes to our creators and the rest to operations & funds to create and license more interesting things,” Kush wrote. “You can cancel anytime if you do NOT enjoy this service. The goal is to create stable income and a place to try out ideas that can be self-produced and perhaps hard to pitch.”

Watch DeMarco’s Eternal Family trailer above.

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Roman Reigns Released A Statement About Backing Out Of WrestleMania

It’s been almost a week since word first got out that Roman Reigns had pulled out of his planned WrestleMania 36 match with Goldberg. It made sense at the time, considering Reigns’ history of health problems and more wrestlers getting sick during this Covid-19 pandemic, but he hadn’t made a statement on the choice himself, until yesterday.

Reigns went live on Instagram, and spoke about the pandemic, his choice to skip Mania, and the vitriol he’s gotten for it. He also talked more broadly about the need for positivity and kindness in the face of times like these.

You already know what’s going on. It’s all over the news, the dirtsheets, whatever you want to call them, that I pulled out of WrestleMania. And it’s funny because for years now, for years now man, years, people have been like, “Don’t show up to WrestleMania, we don’t want you in it.” You know what I mean? There’s a nice handful of dudes and haters that didn’t want me there, but the moment I make a choice for me and my family… I’m a coward? I’m a sissy? A lot of different things that I am now.

But you don’t know the whole story. All you know is what you think. “Oh well, his health and this and that.” But you don’t know what else is going on in my life. You don’t know if I have newborns, you don’t know if I have family in my household, older family. So, yeah I mean, just… like the old saying… go and flip that cover open and read a few pages. Get into a few chapters before you really start running your mouth, and just take this time to better yourself, be present, and make the most out of this because if we can’t grow in a time like this, I don’t think we have a chance, man. This is the most downtime I’ve ever seen in my life. So I just challenge everybody, and I’m taking the steps right there with you. I’m not perfect, I’m a hater too sometimes, you know what I mean? But I try to always put it in perspective of why I want something or why I might be jealous of something, and then I put it in my grind, I put it to work, I figure out how I can get whatever I need or want, and I put it to work, and I don’t focus on others hating on me, and I don’t put focus on driving negativity to anybody else.

If we can, let’s not just do it in the real world, let’s do it on here. It’s easy man, all it takes is starting right now. So just be kind to others, let’s try to better each other, and hopefully we’re gonna come out with so many better habits. But it can’t just be about cleanliness, we gotta be clean inside, too. So, let’s clean up on the outside, let’s clean up our hygiene habits, but let’s also clean up the inside and make each other better, man. We all got to be accountable towards each other. There’s people across the world that have known, and what I do affects them. So, take some pride in that, love each other, respect each other, and hopefully we’re gonna come out way better.

For all my fans, you know I’m sorry I didn’t get to compete this year and put on a show and entertain. But sometimes things are more important and I had to make a choice for me and my family, but no matter what, you already know the deal. Man, I made that town. I made it to Orlando. I had to make a decision for me, but it doesn’t take anything away from what I’ve done and what I’m going to do. I still love this game, I still love pro wrestling, sports entertainment. I love being in the ring. It’s a little weird being in the ring with nobody watching, nobody in the arena, but man, I’m ready to get back to work and I’m just taking these times, this little bit of time we have, to build up the outside and come as close as possible to perfecting the inside, man. So everybody, I love y’all. Thank you for the support. Hopefully we can just continue to get better, man. Until then, stay safe and don’t touch your face. Yes sir!

Right now we don’t know when we’ll see Roman Reigns wrestle again, but he’s obviously excited for that moment to arrive, and whether you’re a fan of his or not, I think that’s going to be a good day for all of us when it finally gets here.

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Roy Wood Jr. On ‘The Daily Show’ And The Importance Of Making People Laugh In The Time Of Coronavirus

As a part of the comedic response that has kicked into high gear over the last two weeks, Roy Wood Jr. has found a battle plan during the Coronavirus quarantine. He’s making people laugh while keeping them informed as a part of The Daily Show‘s Social Distancing episodes, he’s keeping his 3-year-old engaged, and he’s writing.

To be sure, Wood’s apocalypse game is tight. But while you can’t do exactly what he’s doing, the comic’s battleplan is useful — specifically in how he’s clinging to the normal parts of life and striving to not just do, but do good and be productive. Uproxx spoke with Wood about those efforts late last week, delving into how The Daily Show is putting the message above emotion, the need to move past anger, and what he’s doing to help the comedy community.

I’ve got a dog and two roommates that are kind of hovering around so I’m just trying to rock the mute button if I need to. It’s become an art form.

I apologize in advance for my son. He is three. They are loud.

How are you doing with everything?

Really good so far, really good. It’s been chill so far. Surprisingly, in a weird way, as busy. It’s just a different type of busy. I’m trying to fill the time writing a little bit, and not stand-up, but just more TV and film ideas that I have, and just still brainstorming a shit ton of Daily Show stuff. Just figuring out what’s there. I think we’re still getting our feet under us and figuring out the workflow of the day. And then figuring out what we can and can’t get away with and what’s the turn time, because the thing that sucks now, the thing that’s more difficult to navigate, is that I think we went from a 12-hour news cycle, to now, with Corona, I feel like we’re literally in a six-hour to eight-hour news cycle. Every six to eight hours, there’s new information that makes whatever you knew this morning irrelevant.

Right now, the thing that I’m dealing with is a lot of outrage. It’s a lot of fear and a lot of anger, and I’m wondering: how do you process the anger and the outrage over some of the government’s response and is the show and your social helpful or a release valve for you?

I like what we’re doing right now with our show because it gives people something to do other than be angry. We’ve given people ways to help. You know, hey stay home. Hey, if you want to donate supplies, go here. Hey just to track, here’s how you can be part of contributing to the betterment of things. For me, I’ve never seen anger be a useful emotion when it comes to being productive. So, be angry. There’s nothing wrong with being angry. But when you get past that, now what’re you going to do? What’s your next move going to be? What actions are you going to take? And more than anything that’s what we can turn to. That’s what we’ve been trying to work on.

Yeah. I think a really good example of that is Trevor’s interview with Dr. Fauci. Because Trevor was able to address the issue of Trump talking about miracle drugs without necessarily dunking on Trump, which I think may have been unproductive considering who the guest was. He put the message ahead of the emotion. Which is important considering your audience: younger people that have, in some cases, lagged behind when it comes to taking this seriously. Would you agree that you guys have put the message ahead of the emotion?

Yeah. It’s on my Twitter page, it’s under a thread where I was kind of, I was complaining about the way the press conferences have gone with Trump, and how I hate the fact that he avoids questions. I proposed that if Trump avoids the question in the press conference, then the next reporter should ask that question, and then the next and the next. And a journalism professor from NYU, he said something that I agreed with, which is essentially that if the media’s in there just being mad and angry then no one gets any information, and ultimately a journalist’s job is to give information to the people that need it. That might be the more productive mission than just trying to dunk on Trump. Yeah, you dunked on him, but did you help the country? Because after Trump is out of office, whenever it is, people are still going to need help. That’s never going to change. So why not focus on that first and then if you have a little time left over you can dunk on Trump.

Was there ever a thought that you guys wouldn’t do anything from home?

We were always going to do something from home. Trevor’s young and savvy with the internet. What we’re doing now with this full-blown social distancing show, it evolved to that. And it was just, “alright what can we do? What can you talk about? What bits can you get on? Trevor should talk with the correspondents, let’s just try to continue to make sense of all this.” And as weird as it feels to do this, oddly it’s still normal because the entire world is weird now. Until America opens up again, there are no rules on what’s the most effective way to be a political satirist with a webcam. The goals remain the same: you want to give people valuable information, and you also want to try and make them laugh a little bit in the process. And so, the first week went well. When Viacom opted to shut down the studio altogether, and sent us home, forced us to quarantine, the initial idea was yeah we’ll do a couple of things this week and then, “Oh, that went really well. You know what? We should put this on TV.” Trevor’s got a great camera as well. That also helps.

We have a producer who is pregnant, and she was going in for one of her checkups and she asked if we could interview one of the doctors about what’s happening with the masks and the medical equipment. And we managed to turn that into a two-sided interview where I’m basically talking to her through Skype. So there’s still a way to do things and reach people and I think it’s very important for us to continue to try to do that. We’re finding stories and finding things and people that are being affected by this. The weird, odd stuff. The weird side effects of a self-quarantine. Things that you wouldn’t consider that would flourish. The fact that Pornhub’s site crashed a couple of times. Netflix as well. Netflix, they had server issues a couple of days ago. So, that’s funny, light-hearted stuff. You’re able to still inform people about doom and gloom but you’re able to get through it with some humor.

Is the show and the normalcy of the process also helpful for you to deal with this? How are you handling things, like, emotionally? You’ve got a kid. You’re in New York City.

It’s fine right now. You know, I’m most concerned about my mom in Alabama. She’s an administrator of a college, and so they’ve been working to digitize the curriculum. She still has to go to the campus to make sure that the students are taken care of. I’m probably two weeks, two and a half weeks, into this myself, and the one thing that’s odd, that’s oddly comforting is that as a comedian, because I’ve done so many road gigs where I am alone, being alone isn’t that much of an adjustment. It’s just about wondering what the show will be and what the comedy club industry will be on the backside of this. I’m in a better situation than most comedians right now, so I have the luxury of not being able to worry yet.

There’s going to be some ripple effects. Right now, I just keep myself busy writing scripts and trying to create content when I’m not doing stuff for work because there will always be a need for entertainment. This isn’t going to kill entertainment. You look at previous pandemics where millions died, on the other side of that, there were still movies or whatever the entertainment was of that era. It came back. So in the long run, we’ll be okay. The biggest thing I have to deal with is trying to make sure that my damn son is engaged intellectually at all times and not just goofing off.

Can you talk a little about what you did with TipYourWaitstaff and a little bit more about why that’s important?

Yeah, so Mike Birbiglia, that’s his brainchild. Me, Birbiglia, and John Mulaney were just trying to figure out a way to do something for all of the comedy club staff that we know, and have worked with for decades now ourselves… but figure out a way to do something nice for them before all of this federal assistance kicks in for everybody. Because who knows how long it’s going to take for checks to be distributed. But basically, is just two comedians working out new jokes with each other and then in exchange, he hopes that people will donate money to one of the comedy clubs that we nominated on the website. You know, I think it’s an opportunity for the general public to see how comedians create the jokes that they get to laugh at, and a lot of the shit, it’s just brainstorming.

It’s just watching two guys brainstorm, I think if you’re a comedy fan, it’s a very interesting process of showing how the sausage is made. I had fun doing it. I had a blast doing the one I did with Mike so I did it again with Ali Siddiq and I nominated my club in Birmingham. I nominated another club in Huntsville, Alabama. Sarah Silverman just did one, Mulaney did one with Birbiglia and a couple of other names I’m forgetting right now. But it’s been fun. It’s been fun to do and it keeps me close to the stage psychologically because right now I’m not really writing a lot of new material because I just don’t know tonally what type of world I’m going to be stepping back out into, when comedy clubs do open.

Are digital shows and things along those lines like Instagram Live comedy sets something you want to do or is the disconnect from the live audience response too much of a hindrance to doing something like that?

I’m not completely sold on my ability for my comedy to connect without an audience. There are some comedians that are able to do it. Good for them. That’s never been the first idea to come to mind for me. I’ve seen some of it. Mark Normand did one that I thought was really funny where he’s just outside, performing for people on the sidewalk, but he maintains social distance.

Yeah, I saw that one. It was good.

That made me laugh, but I don’t know how I would do it. For me, it feels really weird.

Yeah. I imagine without the response to know if something’s working and without the rhythm of an audience, I would imagine it would be really hard.

Yeah. So I’ll just do what I’ve always done. If something seems funny, I’ll jot it down and when I have the opportunity months from now, I’ll put it on stage and I’ll let new-joke-night at the Comedy Cellar be the discerner.

You can see Roy Wood Jr. on ‘The Daily (Social Distancing) Show’ on Comedy Central weeknights at 11pm ET and on Twitter @RoyWoodJr

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Boston Calling 2020 Has Officially Been Canceled Due To The Coronavirus Pandemic

Most concerts and festivals have either been canceled or postponed due to the coronavirus pandemic, but there are still some events left that haven’t concretely announced that their plans have changed. Today, that list got shorter: Boston Calling has officially canceled their 2020 festival.

Organizers wrote in a statement shared today, “After several weeks of consultation with local and state authorities, we have made the difficult decision to cancel Boston Calling 2020 due to the ongoing pandemic. We are heartbroken; however, the health and safety of our audience, artists, partners, vendors, first responders, and staff are of the utmost importance to us, and we felt that this was the only acceptable way forward.”

This year’s lineup was set to feature Foo Fighters, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Rage Against The Machine, The 1975, Jason Isbell And The 400 Unit, Run The Jewels, Phoebe Bridgers, and others.

Read Boston Calling’s full statement below.

“After several weeks of consultation with local and state authorities, we have made the difficult decision to cancel Boston Calling 2020 due to the ongoing pandemic. We are heartbroken; however, the health and safety of our audience, artists, partners, vendors, first responders, and staff are of the utmost importance to us, and we felt that this was the only acceptable way forward.

To our audience, whom we value dearly, we are so sad that we will not be together with you in May. We know information regarding your tickets is extremely important to you. As such, we will be reaching out to all ticket holders in the coming weeks with a detailed outline of options available. This includes obtaining a full refund or rolling tickets to next year’s event – about which we hope to have exciting news to share soon. We thank you for your patience; please stay tuned and we will be in touch with more information in the near future.

To our valued partners, vendors, restaurants, staff and artists, we wish you all the very best during these trying times, and we look forward to collaborating with you all again soon.

With love,
Boston Calling.”

Some artists covered here are Warner Music artists. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

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WWE Has New WrestleMania Deals With FOX Sports And FITE TV

Here’s some WrestleMania 36 news that isn’t pandemic-related: as of today, there are two new places people can watch it as a pay-per-view.

For those who use the WWE Network, it can be easy to forget that WWE even still releases PPVs as PPVs. But the company has continued to do that since the Network’s launch, with big shows available to purchase through cable providers for typically about sixty dollars.


That’s how much people can pay to watch both nights of WrestleMania through Fox Sports as part of a new deal between the two companies. Per a press release issued today, for the first time ever, WrestleMania will be available to watch as a PPV on the Fox Sports app and Fox, like ESPN recently, will also begin to air past WWE shows starting “on Tuesday nights this spring,” including the 2020 Royal Rumble, “Best of” specials about top WWE stars, episodes from the WWE 24 and Ruthless Aggression series, and one-hour cuts of WrestleManias 31, 33, and 34.

WrestleMania will also be available on Fite TV for the first time this year, priced as sixty dollars for a two-night package deal or $34.99 for each show. According to a press release by Fite (which calls Mania, “WWE’s annual pop culture extravaganza”), the WM 36 can be purchased through the platform, “in the U.S. as well as select international territories.”

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The Best And Worst Of WWE Raw 3/30/20: Alone Again, Naturally

Previously on the Best and Worst of Raw: AJ Styles accurately compared The Undertaker to the Tiger King and challenged him to a “Boneyard Match,” which had to be explained later. Plus, other WrestleMania matches are or aren’t happening!

Things to do: Follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook. You can also follow me on Twitter. BUY THE SHIRT.

One more thing: Hit those share buttons! Spread the word about the column on Facebook, Twitter and whatever else you use. Be sure to leave us a comment in our comment section below as well. I know we always ask this, and that this part is copy and pasted in every week, but we appreciate it every week. It’s almost time for a WrestleMania: Too Big For Just One Night, and also too bad an idea for fans and several important people on your roster.

And now, the Best and Worst of WWE Raw for March 30 2020.

Best: I Saw A Tiger, And The Tiger Saw A Deadman

Firstly, this promo is better with ‘Ether’ behind it.

Secondly, Raw was all about real names last night. Hey ALLEN JONES, I hope you don’t run into ADAM COPELAND, he could tell you about MARK WILLIAM CALAWAY! It’s a strong promo — Undertaker promos are always better when you don’t ask him to do them live, and can’t see him actively trying to remember which goth-ass idiom the script asked him to say next — although I could’ve lived without the suggestion that AJ Styles waited until all the good wrestlers retired before joining WWE. You uh … you don’t think anybody on the show’s worth a shit anymore? Cool, why am I buying the Anytime Fitness version of WrestleMania 36 again? To watch the one wrestler remaining from the time when WWE was good beat up a guy from TNA who sucks in a graveyard cemetery boneyard?

That’s just me not liking that intention and style of promo, though. Beanie Undertaker telling AJ he’s done it now, he’s gone and made a big mistake, and he can’t allow Styles to think he can just walk away has me hopeful that Styles went through all this trouble to bait spooky occult Undertaker only to get his asshole’s ass kicked by a bad-ass. So who’s the “unholy trinity” Undertaker’s bringing to counter Gallows and Anderson? Kane’s definitely one of them. Maybe Acolyte Bradshaw? Naked Mideon? I feel like a small gate with a lock on it would be enough to counter Gallows and Anderson.

Worst: Help Me, Ronda

You know, I thought it was pretty bad last week when Shayna Baszler sat in the middle of the ring in the center of an otherwise dark arena and couldn’t anticipate an attack from Becky Lynch. That shit was the Deadly Game tournament compared to this week, in which Becky Lynch spends 45 minutes standing on the stage with her back to the entrance watching last year’s WrestleMania main event. Why not tie an anchor to your ankles and go swimming in the ocean?

Contrivance of this aside, I feel bad that Becky had to stand there and watch an entire 22-minute match from a year ago plus multiple commercial breaks for the majority of an hour without a chair to sit in, while holding an awkward, six-pound title belt on her shoulder. I feel bad for the rest of us that we had to watch that entire main event again, now with multiple check-ins on Nugenix press conferences for updates on Frank Thomas’ dick integrity. I still think that (1) Ronda Rousey not tapping out in that match was a bum move, and that (2) Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan was the actual main event of WrestleMania 35, and six matches after it (Jesus Christ) were part of some weird post-show we were all roped into sitting through.

So yeah, Becky gets got, and you can’t say she didn’t deserve it. Hoping she loses by submission this weekend when Baszler threatens to Road House her.

Brock Is Here Again, Wonder What He’ll Do?

If you answered, “nothing, while Paul Heyman talks,” congratulations, you’ve watched the show before! I’m not sure what I’m most disappointed about, the fact that they didn’t show that wonderfully melodramatic video of Drew McIntyre doing strongman training in Scotland, or how Paul Heyman had to work, “too big for just one night,” into a promo like that’s a thing somebody would say in real life. WrestleMania, which is Too Big For Just One Night™, is happening during, “the most unique time in our lifetimes.” Nobody say what those times are, that might be too scary! Maybe if the “unique time” continues and WWE never figures out how to get out of these empty arena Raws, Lesnar will be in the go-home segment of next year’s go-home show for WrestleMania as a cartoon or a hand puppet.

+1 to Paul E. for saying, “that is the most extraordinary roster in the history of this industry,” though. Does the Undertaker know that? Does Paul know Stone Cold Steve Austin and The Rock aren’t around anymore? Anyway, Paul’s great. He can’t make these shows and “unique” circumstances any less of a bummer.

Note: This segment is prefaced by Brock vs. Rey Mysterio for Survivor Series in its entirety, and Raw was somehow able to work two whole commercial breaks into a Brock Lesnar match. They should’ve done that with Brock vs. Kofi from Smackdown.

I Can’t Tell Edge From Adam!

As previously mentioned, ADAM COPELAND has a message for [checks Randy Orton’s Wikipedia page to find out his real name] RANDY ORTON about how yes, he might have spent a year as a vampire dumping blood on people in the darkness and yes, he might have hung the Big Boss Man to death with a noose, and yes, he might’ve attacked Kofi Kingston from behind at the Elimination Chamber and taken his spot, and yes, he might’ve married Vickie Guerrero to be able to cheat more easily during his matches, and yes, he might’ve dressed up like Ric Flair to make fun of him having road rage in real life, and yes, he might’ve humped Tommy Dreamer’s wife while pinning her in front of him, and yes, he might’ve speared Mick Foley through a flaming table, and yes, he might’ve literally beaten up John Cena’s dad, but he would never mention somebody’s family in a promo. That is a BRIDGE TOO FAR. You’ve DRAGGED HIM BACK IN for ONE LAST SCORE, Randy.

You can’t just join a faction when you’re starting out, Randy, you have to forge your own path. Unless that faction is a group of vampires, who then become part of the Undertaker’s Ministry of Darkness. Or Team ECK. Or Team RECK. Or La Familia. Or Rated RKO. And you also should never bring in a tag team that looks like you and name them after yourself so they can help you cheat and win all the time. Forge your own path, you coward.

Worst: Austin Theory Practices Social Distancing


Shout-out to WrestleMania championship challenger Austin Theory for doing even less than The Miz would do to catch Montez Ford on this dive. Damn, dude. Shit sounded like somebody was closing the cage door on an old elevator.

Worst: The Team Challenging For The Raw Tag Team Championship At WrestleMania Loses Their Only Match Ever As A Team, And Kevin Owens Has No Comeback

The only match of note besides two jobber squashes was Kevin Owens and the Street Profits versus Seth Rollins, Angel Garza, and Austin Theory. You’d think with WrestleMania being only five days away they’d either have Owens pin Rollins or vice versa, or have the team we’ve never seen before until literally right now who somehow have a Raw Tag Team Championship match pin the Raw Tag Team Champions — welcome to a strange new world where I’m asking them to have a challenger pin a champion — but Owens just ends up pinning Garza after a Stunner. Sure, I guess. Not sure what that does for anybody, as the challengers really needed to prove themselves as legitimate opponents for the Raw tag champs and Kevin Owens really doesn’t need a win over Angel Garza to prove he can hang with Seth Rollins, but it is what it is.

Rollins Stomps him immediately following the pin, and Owens sticks around in the ring afterward to cut a promo in response to last week’s complete bodying. In case you missed it, Rollins cited history, pointing out his crucial role of being the face of FCW and then NXT during its formative years and how without him, history would be completely different and NXT might’ve never become a thing anybody cared about. The WWE Performance Center probably wouldn’t exist, and there wouldn’t be as easy a route to the big leagues for former independent stars like Kevin Steen. He also pointed out that Owens almost always loses like a goober at WrestleMania (including a losses to Shane McMahon and Zack Ryder) while Rollins has pinned Triple H, Roman Reigns, Brock Lesnar, Miz, and so on. So what’s Owens’ response this week? To say that yeah, sure, whatever, but nobody likes you. That’s it. Yes, you did all those things but also maybe you didn’t and you suck anyway so who cares. Even his claim that Rollins only ever won with help discounts major wins over Triple H (which was Rollins raging AGAINST being a cheating Corporate champion) and Lesnar. He won the Intercontinental Championship on his own in a triple threat match at WrestleMania 34, whereas Owens’ only IC title match at Mania ended with him on the ground while the lamest wrestler in the company stood tall.

It’s just … very WWE. The facts don’t matter. The facts are what BAD GUYS think. Logic and reason and remembering history and being able to form cohesive arguments is for jerks. The only thing that matters is whether or not people are clapping for you right now. Which is weird hill to die on already, but considerably weirder now that there’s no people and no clapping. I don’t necessarily think WWE’s problems will be instantly fixed when Vince McMahon dies, but at least maybe then we’ll be able to move past his aging one-percenter understanding of power and self-worth. Maybe we’ll be able to move past all the good guys being callous, selfish, opportunistic loners against the villainy of a bunch of free-thinking, complex human beings with friends and relationships.

Jobbers Of The Week

Aleister Black has that one quarantine match he keeps having against Jason Cade, whom you may remember from Full Impact Pro and WWN. He says he only lost the match because he got distracted by a fan, which is pretty funny. At least he got in one offensive move, which is better than Leon Ruff got in two identical matches!

NXT’s Kayden Carter also shows up to lose to Asuka, which is a nice if all too brief reminder of how cool and dominant Asuka was and could still be in NXT. I guess she needs a rebound win between losing clean to Alexa Bliss last week and losing to Alexa Bliss this weekend at WrestleMania.

Best: Boots 2 Asses

Finally we have my favorite moment of the week, which is Rhea Ripley confidently walking into the building with no peripheral vision whatosever and getting booted in the back by Charlotte Flair like it’s a Monty Python’s Flying Circus transition. I wish it’d made a “phhht” noise when it connected. If Rhea can’t see 6-foot tall-ass Charlotte Flair with her black clothes and Dolly Parton hair standing in the middle of an empty Florida parking lot in the middle of the day, I’m surprised she can get a fork from the table to her mouth without it going rogue and poking her in the eye.

WWE Network

Best: Top 10 Comments Of The Week

The Real Birdman

The Big Show Show?

The Wight House was right there

“To that dumbass who says ‘I can do that WWE stuff’”

Leave Natalya alone

AJ Dusman

“I hate to be the one to pull back the curtain.”
“JBL is only champion because Triple H doesn’t want to work Tuesdays.”


Clay Quartermain

With no crowds, you could say the Street Profits are having a Private Party.


The term “go-home show” feels so different now.


(Angel Garza performs Camel Clutch move)
GARZA: They said avoid touching your face. They never said anything about touching other peoples faces.



Undertaker: AJ, I invite you to ride my bone train to our boneyard match at Wrestlemania!
AJ: What’re you laughing at, Karl?
Karl Anderson: If I’m laughing at what I think I am, it’s very funny

Big Baby Yeezus

LMAO Goldberg vs. (Card subject to changes)

“We’re going to show you how tough Brock Lesnar is”

*Shows Lesnar beating the smallest guy on the roster*


That’s it for this week’s attempt at a Best and Worst of Raw. I guess we’re just moving forward pretending the WrestleMania card still looks like that, huh? Should we sit back and accept that WWE’s going to eventually plan an in-universe explanation for why Roman Reigns and The Miz aren’t there, or should we be mad that they’re falsely advertising championship matches that aren’t happening to get Network subscriptions out of people who don’t read wrestling blogs and don’t know what’s going on behind the scenes? Is the answer somewhere in the middle?

Comments and social media shares are deeply appreciated, and any other kind of love you’d like to show is going to mean more than ever in the current climate. Especially if we don’t have anything to write about for a couple of months. Join us this weekend for …. [checks notes] WrestleMania? You gotta be joking me.

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Drake, The Weeknd, And J. Cole FaceTimed With 11-Year-Old Fan Before He Died Of Cancer

With today’s plethora of communication technology, it’s now easier than ever for musicians to come in direct contact with fans whose lives they’ve touched in an array of ways. Drake, The Weeknd, and J. Cole were able to share some special moments with one of their biggest fans, an 11-year-old cancer patient named Elijah. Elijah, unfortunately, passed away this week, but the young music fan was able to meet his biggest icons over FaceTime before his untimely death.

In a video shared to social media by his older cousin, Drake, The Weeknd, and J. Cole all individually met Elijah over FaceTime with his family. “I’m so honored to be one of your favorite artists, buddy,” The Weeknd said in his FaceTime call. “Thank you.” Elijah’s cousin shared the video along with the young fan’s incredible story:

“Over the past 3 years, my 11 y.o. cousin, Elijah, has battled cancer with the utmost resilience. Elijah’s physical fight is now complete, as he transitioned to heaven on Friday. He didn’t leave this world without knowing how much he was loved though. Last weekend, Elijah got to “meet” 3 of his favorite artists — The Weeknd, J. Cole, & Drake. Incredibly grateful for these 3 super-humans being so caring for my family during this time. We’ll hold onto these moments forever.”

Read the full heart-warming story above.

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Kevin Durant And Donovan Mitchell Will Reportedly Participate In The NBA’s Upcoming 2K Tournament

One way that basketball players have remained occupied during the league’s COVID-19 hiatus has been video games. Some have opted to stream games from their homes, with some reportedly hopping on board with an NBA 2K tournament that the league is going to hold and broadcast on ESPN.

Chris Haynes of Yahoo Sports brought word of the tournament, which is slated to include 16 players from around the league. We’re still waiting to get the names of everyone who will participate, but on Tuesday morning, Haynes reported four of the All-Star names that we’ll see take to the virtual hardwood, which includes Brooklyn Nets star Kevin Durant and Utah Jazz standout Donovan Mitchell.

Via Yahoo Sports:

The NBA is planning a players-only NBA 2K tournament that is expected to feature some of the league’s sharpest video gamers, including Kevin Durant, and it will be broadcast on ESPN, league sources told Yahoo Sports.

The league hopes to launch the event Friday, with the 16-player tournament lasting 10 days. It is expected to include stars such as the Utah Jazz’s Donovan Mitchell, four-time All-Star DeMarcus Cousins and two-time All-Star Andre Drummond, among other big-name players, sources said.

It’s obviously going to be an exciting tournament and a fun way to watch basketball at a time when the only ways to do that are YouTube mixtapes and diving into the League Pass archive. But beyond that, Durant and Mitchell were two of the first NBA players to have confirmed cases of COVID-19 — Mitchell has been given the all clear, while we have not heard one way or another on Durant, and getting to see that both of them are doing well is a good thing.

We’ll be sure to keep you updated on the full list of names that will participate when it becomes available. This is not the only 2K-related event happening in the coming days, as the NBA 2K League is in the midst of its own tournament. We’ll be participating in it on Tuesday night, and you can read more about that right here.

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Big Thief’s Adrianne Lenker Hopes For John Prine’s Good Health With A Cover Of His Track ‘Summer’s End’

Iconic songwriter John Prine has fallen ill to the coronavirus as the global pandemic spreads. While Prine is currently hospitalized in “critical” condition, many musicians are showing their support for the influential musician and wishing for his speedy recovery. Joan Baez recently shared a cover of Prine’s “Hello In There” to offer her support. Now, Big Thief’s vocalist Adrianne Lenker is following suit by sharing a cover of Prine’s “Summer’s End.”

Posting the cover to social media, Lenker expressed her well wishes to the singer: “I’m beyond grateful for the gift of his songs, sending love to his whole family,” she wrote. With just an acoustic guitar and her emotive vocal delivery, Lenker gives a heart-tugging rendition of the iconic musician’s song.

Ahead of Lenker’s cover, Prine’s wife Fiona shared an update about his condition. Fiona also contracted a case of the coronavirus and shared Sunday that she’s made a full recovery. “I have recovered from Covid-19,” she wrote. “We are humbled by the outpouring of love for me and John and our precious family. He is [stable]. Please continue to send your amazing Love and prayers.” Prine was rushed to the hospital Thursday after showing symptoms of the virus. Prine has suffered from cancer twice, so his pre-existing health conditions put him at greater risk with the virus.

Watch Lenker cover Prine’s “Summer’s End” above.

Read more of Uproxx’s coverage on the coronavirus here.

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CNN Anchor Chris Cuomo Has Tested Positive For The Coronavirus

News anchor Chris Cuomo has tested positive for the coronavirus, according to CNN. Cuomo will continue to host Cuomo Prime Time from home where he’s quarantined in his basement. Cuomo released the following statement on Twitter where he expressed concern about exposing his wife and children, but remained optimistic about his outcome as well as the nation’s:

Sooooo in these difficult times that seem to get more difficult and complicated by the day, I just found out that I am positive for corona virus. I have been exposed to people in recent days who have subsequently tested positive and I had fevers, chills and shortness of breath. I just hope I didn’t give it to the kids and Cristina. That would make me feel worse than this illness! I am quarantined in my basement (which actually makes the rest of my family seem pleased!) I will do my shows from here. We will all beat this thing by tough and smart and united!

Since announcing his diagnosis, CNN reports that Cuomo’s brother and New York governor Andrew Cuomo has responded to the news with good humor during his daily press briefing.

“This virus is the great equalizer,” he said. “My brother, Chris, is positive for coronavirus. Found out this morning.”

The governor called Chris “my best friend” and added a little bit of the good-natured ribbing they’re known for: “He’s young; in good shape; strong — not as strong as he thinks, but — he’ll be fine.”

The two brothers spoke by phone earlier on Tuesday. “Now he’s quarantined in the basement,” the governor said. “But he’s funny as hell, he says to me, ‘Even the dogs won’t come downstairs.’”

Cuomo is the third coronavirus case to hit CNN headquarters in New York City, and the network has been rapidly working to address the pandemic through “sweeping changes,” including having employees work from home and filming segments from their own personal studios/basements.

You can watch Governor Cuomo address his brother’s diagnosis below:

(Via CNN)