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Is Someone Worried About Getting Spit In His Coffee? Ted Cruz Is Now Trying To Walk Back His ‘Slacker Barista’ Comment

Add Starbucks to the growing list of eateries Ted Cruz might want to steer clear of in the future. Last week, the Texas senator voiced his disapproval of Joe Biden’s student loan forgiveness program by a**holishly suggesting on his podcast that it was just a way to buy votes from “that slacker barista who wasted seven years in college studying completely useless things, now has loans and can’t get a job.” He added further insult when he snarkily continued that if said slackers “can get off the bong for a minute and go down to the voting station — or just send in your mail-in ballot that Democrats have helpfully sent you — it could drive up turnout.”

The backlash to Cruz — a man who many believe once swallowed a booger on national TV in the middle of a debate — and his comments was immediate, and maybe the backwash, too.

Now, Cruz is desperately attempting to walk back his snobbish insults, and again using his podcast to do that. (That a senator has time to create a podcast should tell you something about both their priorities and workload.) Yet, once again, he came off as an insensitive, out-of-touch dick.

With his trademark smirk firmly in place, Cruz attempted to paint the negative response to his previous comments as ridiculous. First, by repeating them almost word for word. Then explaining that:

When I said that some slackers are baristas, they translated that into all baristas are slackers. Which is… maybe you could help me out with deductive logic, but I’m pretty sure that second statement doesn’t flow from the first.

Are there people who wasted years studying utterly useless things who couldn’t get a job afterwards and who are now working as baristas and are slackers? Yes! Those people do exist! Is every barista a slacker? Of course not! There are wonderful, great people who are baristas… Many of whom don’t have student loans and are getting screwed by the Democrats because they’re saying the guy that studied Queer Pet Literature and has $100,000 in debt because, oddly enough — to reference another podcast, Mickey and Pluto going at it — other than getting a job at Disney, there’s not a lot of job market for Queer Pet Literature.

Note to Ted: Homophobia probably wasn’t your best defense!

Cruz, not content to just keep his foot in his mouth and move on to another topic, pressed even further forward and had the temerity to proclaim that the Republicans are the ones looking out for those slacker baristas’ interests — along with “the steelworkers, the truck drivers, the cops, the firefighters, the waiters and waitresses.” And, of course, the baristas. Meanwhile, Cruz claimed that “the Democrats crap in the coffee cup of baristas,” which very well might be that piquant flavor Ted is tasting in his next latte.